Pepsi™ Cheer Nation® ©PepsiCo Canada ULC, 2009

Can we get all of Canada to fall in line, march to the beat of a drum pounded by the sticky fingers of an American - fine, multinational (but that's not any better, is it?) corporation?

In fall 2009, I laughed at the notion that a mega-corporation could successfully convince a proud hockey nation that we're less united than Australia or the United States, both of whom have their own cheers that everyone's supposed to know. I laughed because it was a ridiculous proposition for a nation that is united by our love of hockey. I found it stupefying that anyone could cheer proudly when the cheer is followed by the small font of

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And you know what, quite frankly, I made fun of how bad the "finalists" for corporate cheer to unite a clueless nation® were.

But wait a second. Now Pepsi is telling us that the first million fans to register get to have their names written in the Hockey Hall of Fame? Million fans. That means that not only are they expecting us to fall in line to their demands, but they're also letting us know that there'll be a lot of people doing it; why aren't you?

Now I'm starting to think, even though I still hate the idea of having my national cheer be a freaking marketing ploy initiated by a company with origins in New Bern, North Carolina, that this may turn out to be quite the effective marketing initiative. They've clearly put a lot of thought into this. By noticing that there's no obvious "Canada" cheer (other than Ca-na-da, I suppose) attacking our supposed American inferiority complex by displaying the U-S-A chant, and then enlisting the help of a figure of hockey authority - the Hockey Hall of Fame, a lot of pressure is being put on the zombie television-watching army. While public opinion may still ultimately turn against this strategy, the fact that opinions are forming must mean something. All publicity is good publicity, right?

Maybe this Pepsi Cheer will catch on eventually. Personally, I think they'll be successful in getting people to write their names so that they see it when they visit the HHOF. But honestly, I wouldn't be caught dead at a sporting event even whispering a crappy Ramones rip-off chant: "Eh O' Canada Go® or © or ™". A friend of mine found the phrase too unwieldy with all its syllables. I don't share that opinion, but I think I'll have trouble pronouncing the ®, © or ™ part.